Dealing With Inadequacy and Inferiority
Life can be filled with many ups and downs, often leaving us experiencing an array of emotions. Whether it be disappointment at not achieving something you’d hoped to, or feeling left out in a friendship group, the majority of us are able to process these feelings and move forwards. But what happens when these feelings run much deeper, and leave you with a constant underlying feeling of not feeling good enough?
In this blog we’ll cover questions such as, ‘What is an inferiority complex?’, and provide practical support for managing these feelings. Read on to discover more about why getting to know yourself better will help you to move through these feelings and embrace life.
Understanding Inadequacy and Inferiority
As we’ve already discovered, most of us will have experienced feelings of inadequacy and inferiority at some point in our lives. It’s very common to compare ourselves to others, or find ourselves feeling less than everyone around us, when it comes to abilities and accomplishments. This is commonly known as imposter syndrome and can be fuelled by social media, leaving us feeling triggered by the things we see going on around us, and feeling like we just aren’t enough as we are.
Whilst experiencing these feelings from time to time is fairly normal for many people, others may find themselves struggling with these feelings long-term. This is known as an inferiority complex, meaning a person has a constant deep feeling of not being enough.
An Inferiority complex, also known as chronic low self esteem, can begin during childhood, or be associated with deeper feelings about physical appearance, or social status. Someone who has experienced Adverse Childhood Trauma (ACE) is more likely to develop an inferiority complex later in life.
A person with an inferiority complex feels insecure, and has continual feelings of inadequacy. Whilst at first they may at first seem overly confident, deep down they believe that they are inferior to others. Some common signs are:
Being excessively competitive
Seeking attention
Sensitive to criticism
Criticising others
Failing to apologise or admit mistakes
Overly hyping themselves up
The term inferiority complex was first spoken about by Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler. The adler inferiority complex was introduced in the 1920s to describe Adler’s theory on where the feeling of inferiority stems from. Adler had previously followed Sigmund Freud’s work, before breaking away to form his own theories on the inferiority complex.
Adlerian psychology says that human behaviour is influenced by its social context, and so a holistic approach is needed when trying to overcome feelings of inadequacy.
The Impact of Inadequacy and Inferiority on Life and Well-being
The long-term impacts of suffering with an inferiority complex can be overwhelming, and have adverse effects on all areas of life, including mental health. The thought of failure can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as a person focuses only on the negative aspects of themselves, and may even self-sabotage in order to keep themselves in the same patterns that feel safe and familiar. People who feel a sense of inferiority may even end up displaying signs of having a superiority complex. This involves striving for superiority to overcompensate for the feelings of inadequacy they experience deep down.
This inferior complex can affect all areas of life, limiting personal relationships, career choices, confidence, and general happiness. It can even lead to mental health conditions.
Strategies to Cope with Feelings of Inadequacy
When it comes to overcoming an inferiority complex, there are strategies you can implement that will help you to cope with the feelings you experience.
Each of us is completely unique and has something special to bring to our life experience. But for a person struggling with thoughts of inferiority, they will only see their negative aspects. When we can accept ourselves fully for who we are, we begin to see our individuality as something special, rather than something that is negative.
There are lots of ways to embrace who we are, such as practising self-compassion, and working on our confidence. Notice the thoughts that occupy your mind, and the words you speak to yourself; are these building you up or pulling you down? Are you spending too much time comparing yourself to others? If negative thoughts are affecting you, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) helps to examine the thoughts you are having, and helps you to learn how to reframe them into more positive ones.
It can be helpful to surround yourself with people who will lift you up, rather than put you down. When a space is safe enough, and we feel supported, we are more likely to embrace who we are. Offer yourself kindness during this process. It will take time to unlearn the habits that you have adopted to keep you feeling safe.
Building Resilience against Feelings of Inferiority
Resilience is our ability to be able to recover when we experience challenges. For those struggling with feelings of inferiority, it’s important to build a strong foundation to grow from. The resilient person will be able to handle challenges better, and be able to manage their own emotional reactions during difficult times.
You can build resilience by getting to know yourself better, and strengthening your self-esteem and confidence. The more you work on accepting who you are, the better the relationships you will build around you. And the more content you will become in your own individuality.
Practices such as mindfulness will also help to build mental resilience. This allows you to focus on the present moment, and become more aware when it comes to the thoughts that you are having. Mindfulness helps us to become less judgemental, and more accepting of life around us.
How Therapy and Professional Help can Assist
Dealing with feelings of inferiority can run deep, and can be overwhelming when trying to deal with on your own. If you choose to seek professional help, then working with a therapist who will provide a private and non-judgemental space, could form an important part of your healing journey. Whether it’s counselling, psychotherapy, or learning techniques such as CBT, therapy can help to guide you towards a more positive way of dealing with the challenges that you find yourself facing.
Key Takeaways
Living with feelings of inferiority can deeply affect your whole life, in ways you may never have realised. The key is to begin to see yourself in a new light, and to accept your own uniqueness and value.
As you learn to build your resilience and strengthen your own foundation, it will be easier to change the story of inadequacy that has been dictating your life for so long. Allow yourself to embrace these opportunities for healing, and completely transform your life.